Ali Hassan

Tourist attractions wouldn’t be so had if it weren’t for all the tourists.

Last week I took a tour of the Speight’s brewery in Dunedin. It was interesting. The brewery is old — parts of it date to the nineteenth century and a fair amount of old copper brewing equipment has been retained (see photo).

But the whole experience was marred by a woman in the group I was in. The thing that irritated me was her incessant questions. She had so many questions for the guide you would have thought she was planning to open a brewery of her own. And she’d ask them at the worst possible time, so we go stuck in the “time tunnel” looking at dioramas or in the theatre after the video presentation. Her little interrogations kept us from spending more time looking at the things we’d actually come to see. And, more importantly, it reduced the amount of time we spent in the bar imbibing free samples of the amber nectar.

Not that she cared: she drank lemonade.

Pegasus Bay Winery Platter for Two

Baked French goat’s cheese parcel, fennel, citrus and date salad — white bean soup, watercress purée –- terrine of confit pork and chicken, crisp apple and riesling jelly – Italian buffalo mozzarella, cherry tomatoes, prosciutto, cipolla onions –- truffled rare beef and horseradish crossini –- home cold-smoked salmon, marinated artichoke, lemon caper dressing — ciabatta, olive oil, Maldon sea salt.

Accompanied by the Pegasus Bay 2006 Sauvignon/Semillon.

The Moeraki Boulders are my most favourite tourist attraction in New Zealand.

They’re a formation of about 20 or so large boulders that sit on a beach about halfway down the South Island. The only really interesting thing about it is that the boulders are almost perfectly spherical. They’re interesting in the way that unusual natural phenomena are. It’s like an enormous game of billiards has been abandoned in the middle of a frame. It’s not an awe-inspiring scene like the sounds or the mountains, it’s just a beach full of bizarrely round boulders. Every time I see them I think it’s odd and a little off-kilter.

And that’s pretty much all there is to it. Outside of the boulders it’s just an ordinary beach. The only building for miles is a cafeteria just off the main road. I remember when it called itself tearooms and sold sandwiches; now it sells sandwiches but calls them panini. There are no plaques to read at Moeraki, no tour guides, no informative DVD presentations to watch, no bus loads of people taking pictures of one another. Nobody minds if you climb all over the rocks. And all that counts for something.