Ali Hassan

Pegasus Bay Winery Platter for Two

Baked French goat’s cheese parcel, fennel, citrus and date salad — white bean soup, watercress purée –- terrine of confit pork and chicken, crisp apple and riesling jelly – Italian buffalo mozzarella, cherry tomatoes, prosciutto, cipolla onions –- truffled rare beef and horseradish crossini –- home cold-smoked salmon, marinated artichoke, lemon caper dressing — ciabatta, olive oil, Maldon sea salt.

Accompanied by the Pegasus Bay 2006 Sauvignon/Semillon.

The Moeraki Boulders are my most favourite tourist attraction in New Zealand.

They’re a formation of about 20 or so large boulders that sit on a beach about halfway down the South Island. The only really interesting thing about it is that the boulders are almost perfectly spherical. They’re interesting in the way that unusual natural phenomena are. It’s like an enormous game of billiards has been abandoned in the middle of a frame. It’s not an awe-inspiring scene like the sounds or the mountains, it’s just a beach full of bizarrely round boulders. Every time I see them I think it’s odd and a little off-kilter.

And that’s pretty much all there is to it. Outside of the boulders it’s just an ordinary beach. The only building for miles is a cafeteria just off the main road. I remember when it called itself tearooms and sold sandwiches; now it sells sandwiches but calls them panini. There are no plaques to read at Moeraki, no tour guides, no informative DVD presentations to watch, no bus loads of people taking pictures of one another. Nobody minds if you climb all over the rocks. And all that counts for something.

There is a 30-foot tall fibreglass salmon in Rakaia. This is not a unique feature in small town New Zealand. Gore has a big trout. Paeroa has a big soft-drink bottle. Ohakune has a big carrot.

Another one of these ridiculous signs. This one is at Taiaroa Head in Dunedin, New Zealand. Isn’t the fence enough? Do we really need a sign to tell us that tumbling forty meters onto the rocks below might be kinda, y’know, bad?